People keep asking me ‘What now? What’s your plan? What are you doing next?’October saw the end of two huge parts of my life: my relationship and my job. Now, the future is scary and big and wide open and 2014 is going to look nothing like I planned. I’m kinda scared, I’m a lot of nervous and loads of excited. I’ve cried a lot in the past few weeks (a lot, I swear, probably solely supported the tissue industry for a while). I still feel down a lot, but I’ve made the decision to stop being sad.
It’s not easy. There are still a lot of hard days, a lot of lonely days. My heart is achey, my bed is empty, my desk is too clean. But I’m trying to find my happiness again. I’m trying to enjoy being on my own and alone. To embrace the unknown in my daily life.
I want to get out more. I’m making coffee dates with Twitter friends. Seeing old friends from drinks. Leaning heavily on my close friends and three besties (love you girls). I was in my current job for three years and seven months, my relationship for two years and two months – and now they’re gone. I’m still working in my old office (but in a new job) for another week before I move floors. I’m still good (great) friends with The Ex-Boyfriend. Things are the same, but not.
There’s a big old world out there and I think I’m ready to be part of it again.